There are advantages and disadvantages to having a chronic illness. That might sound very strange to you but from my vantage point, having a chronic illness means i get to share with the world what it's really like to have an illness and be in constant pain. Life isn't easy for any of us. But if i can share my story and help us all understand one another better, then i view that as a positive.
I've been wanting to share some of the mundane day-to-day things i go through for a while now. This is an open diary i'll be keeping through a week of my life. This week, you're my best friend and i'm telling you everything...well, mostly.
Monday mornings are usually good for me. I hate Mondays. But i always try to get up early and get going on work, and set up the week as i'd like it to carry on.
This Monday was a completely different story though. I woke up at 11am, earphones still in from falling asleep to my favourite film 'while you were sleeping' and i felt like i'd been run over. I spent all of Sunday in bed and was throwing up all of Sunday evening... this isn't a common occurrence for me so i felt pretty rotten.
I tried to get up, however it took me til 1pm to get downstairs and finally stomach a piece of toast. I spent the majority of the day checking up on business on Instagram, watching 2 films then doing some illustrating.
You see, i battle with ALOT of guilt when it comes to my work. I'm an artist. Love my job. So thankful to the people that continue to pay me for what i love. But when i'm sick it all comes to a standstill. The commissions list gets longer and then comes the guilt.
When your sick, who knows how long you'll be out of the game. So you think about all the work you should be doing when you can't.
It's a vicious circle that i'll discuss more of later in the week.
For now, this has been DAY 1. And i am feeling alot better tonight.
Much Love, Beth xxx
P.S. my mum brought home peonies yesterday. She bought them to cheer her & i up and they kept me company today... aren't they beautiful?!?!