I cherish the Beauty blogger community and so many lovely people have been really supportive of me in the past few months. I feel that it is really necessary to be honest with all you lovely people. I'm having a real tough time of it lately, i would like to pretend i'm not but that wouldn't be being honest with myself. About 4 years ago now i started getting side affects from what i now know to be Joint Hypermobility syndrome. Telling people what i have instantly puts a label on me and people start to presume what my life must be like. I know there are thousands, probably millions of people worse off than me. But that doesn't stop whatever conditions i have affecting me physically, emotionally and most of all mentally!
I'm constantly put on different tablets, half of which don't actually seem to be doing much. I have a constant stream of appointments. And i know alot of people think it's in my head because i seem and look like a pretty normal human being. I can walk, dance, have fun, just like everyone else. But most people don't see the 24 hour sleeps, or the complete lack of sleep. Most people don't know that there are days on end where it's an achievement to get out of my bed, walk downstairs and make a cup of tea.
I know there's hope, there's always things in life which bring all of us joy and happiness. But sometimes those moments can seem so far away.
It's so disappointing when you can't find it within yourself to even achieve the most basic of goals...and, that is what life feels like to me at the moment. I sleep, i eat, and i feel purposeless. I know in a week or so i'll probably be in a better state of mind but every now and again we all have these low points...i wanted to share mine...
Much Love, Bethany xxx